How to Raise Cooperative Toddlers- Part 1

Toddlerhood has to be the most challenging and amazing stage of parenting. I’m constantly in awe just watching our son grow, run around, and kiss his little sister. He’s the best big brother.
I often pause and say ‘God, you good enuh’ because I remember this little boy in my tummy. 

In this post, we’ll go through five tips on raising cooperative toddlers.
It is important to remember that each child has a unique personality, and as a parent, we should love this child for who he or she is and not who we want them to be.

The five tips we’ll look at in this post are:

1. Not Saying No
2. Respect goes both ways
3. Routines
4. Managing tantrums
5. Patience and Prayer

Not Saying No
Toddlerhood is marked by MOBILITY. Your baby is on the move and curiosity is the name of the game so it is easy to say no but we must resist.
Instead, master the art of distraction, pull out their favourite toy- show them how exciting it is by being excited first. If you show them how excited you are, they will naturally want to know what it is you are so interested in. You’ll soon find that you won’t even need to say no (as often). Beautiful!

Respect goes both ways

For our children to learn respect, we must first be the ones to show it. In our language to each other and when we speak to them.
For eg, if I am asking Adam for an item. I would say “Adam, may I have (insert name of item) please?”  Instead of taking it from him, it shows him that when he needs something from me, he needs to ask me first and not pull it out of my hand.
This will not work overnight but by constant repetition and reinforcement, one day he will surprise us.

Routines
My husband, John-Luke often tells me about his childhood, as he is quite fond of it. He would always say- as a child he thought everything stopped at 8 pm because that was their bedtime lol. He eventually learned it was not so and that was only because of a school project that required him to stay up to watch the 10 pm news.
I say all this to say, that routines provide a sense of security, they cut down toddler struggles, support learning and help to deal with separation.
Many parents cringe at the idea of a routine because they expect it to be a strict set of tasks done at a specific time. I know this because I am one of them. Routines are series of actions that happen in a predetermined order on most days. Whereas, a schedule involves activities done at a specific time for eg, a work schedule where clients are seen at set times. Therefore, when a routine is established, your child is able to predict what will happen next and so provide positive behaviour patterns in the home.

Managing Tantrums
Managing Toddlers is such an art form in and of itself. How do I get this tiny human to listen to me when all he wants is to just throw himself on the floor and wail!
It is important to understand that this tiny individual is not an adult- what I mean is that his brain is still growing. Imagine this, the part of your brain responsible for planning, inhibition and regulation of emotional behaviour is only fully formed somewhere between 21 and 23 years old.
Therefore, it’s so important to extend grace to our little ones, they are GROWING and it takes time and a whole lot of PATIENCE!

Patience and Prayer

Truth be told, how can we really say we are patient if we are not tested on the virtue? Being a mom to a toddler will give you many opportunities to learn patience, embrace them! And don’t forget to pray through it.

I hope these five tips help you in some way, come back next week for part two where I’ll share five more tips!

Thank you so much for reading!

Leave a comment and Share this with your friends who have young children.

Til Next Week,
Abby